I'm smarterer then u' 4 now 01/25/2008
When I was younger I went to this Intellect Center more or less every Sunday from 10AM - 1PM for 5 years straight. In this place there were numerous "groups" ranging in, though the owner would not like to admit, smartness, of course with such a range of vocabulary as I just showed (comon, who can beat smartness?) I was obviously placed in the smartest group (because really if I wasn't would I ever tell you this story?). The group consisted of about 5 - 9 people with a good 3,4 of whom I knew incredibly well. For the last 2 years I have not went there and, to my knowledge, neither have any of my friends.
Then this Monday I get a call from the owner stating that because it is the 10th Annversary of the Intellect Center he is inviting back, this Saturday, all of his best students. I remembered when the 5 year annversary took place. I had only recently begun going there but I distinctly remember whooping the asses of all of the "older" people who had already left the center. I felt (as I should of) so proud. Now thinking back on this moment I am scared to death because I know that when the time comes (tomorrow) we are all going to get intellectually raped by those who are numerous years younger then us...ohh what an embarrasment it will be. I quickly call all of my friends to see if they are going, thinking either maybe with enough brain power we can win or at least I won't look like the only complete and utter dipshit there. Thankfully, or so they said to me, most of them are coming, so at least we will look like idiots together (somehow that makes it seem alright).
When it just premiered I watched "Are You Not Dumberer than a Mentally Retarded Chimp with Alkhimers?" laughing at the idiots on stage thinking, god how do you not know that 4 is the next number after 3. Now that I think about it, I have to admit, that though I might not be dumberer now by the time I am become elligiable to go onto the show I am almost certain that I will also be "not smarter than a 5th grader" (ohh look at that I remembered the title).
Oscar's a comin! 01/23/2008
Well that isn't really a correct statement what with the WGA strike (YOU KNOW WHAT IF YOU HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO GO ON SUCH A LONG STRIKE WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ASKING FOR MORE YOU GREEDY EVIL BASTEREDS!!!) there might not even be any Oscar's this year. I am proud to say that out of the 5 movies nominated for best picture I have seen 2 of them and want to see two others (...yeah you heard me right Atonement I want to only see 2 others...). The two I saw were Michale Clayton and No Country For Old Men both amazing films though No Country is superior. I'd make Oscar predictions but I haven't seen all the films so I'd just be regurgitating what others have already said. Still here is a shout to everyone to go see as many Oscar contenders as possible not so you can seem intelligent come (?) award night but just for your own enjoyment and so that you can seem intelligent after and before award night also.
No Country For Old Men: Simply put an amazing thriller (and I am not a fan of thrillers) with a great cast and possibly the best villain in movie history (if not the top 5 for sure). I will be shocked if Javier Bardem does not win the Oscar for best supporting actor.
Human contact is overrated. 01/09/2008
I'll be the first to say that human contact (as in talking to others) is highly overrated. The English language is said to have more words than any other language in the world yet it's never possible to truly express your emotions about well anything simply with words, from talking about something stupid like a bum attacking you on the subway to something more far more complex like love one always breaks out into creating many different expressive (yet still equally unhelpful) hand gestures (among other parts of the body) or begins to turn red as he mumbles under his breath something that sounds like profanities or German (which one of these applies to love and which one to the attacking bum one can never be sure of as all people are different, or as your mother would say special as long as both do not occur at the same time you are usually in the clear.
If you somehow manage to find somebody that is actually on your intellect level chances are that you two have completely different interests or when having a conversation with one another (aka arguing) get frustrated that neither one of you can seemingly win the argument and result to, what I believe to be the cornerstone of civilization, unnecessary, unprovoked violence.
Seeing as this is how I think, the logical thing for me to do is to create a blog. This way I can write whatever I damn well please and have it only read by people with about the same level of intellect (there has to go be a better word for it than intellect but I'm not going to think) as me since those below mine would not understand this and get either bored or frustrated and those above mine would consider this too simple and get bored or frustrated (maybe the geniuses are also the idiots?). Also if I am unpleased by a person's comment to what I write I can easily delete it as if they never said (technically wrote) anything.
With all this said, I am unhappy that I do not have a lot of visitors on this site. I admit that a minute ago I stated that human contact is overrated and am now asking for more of it (in one form or another). Now you may ask yourself why. Good question. To this wonderful question you just spontaneously brought up there is an idiotic answer and a smart answer. My answer: I am a hippocrate. Whether this is the smart or idiotic answer is completely up to you, but I think you can all guess in which category I think it falls...
Me Talk Pretty One Day indeed 01/08/2008
I have just finished reading my first book since September (how utterly pathetic) and its a collection of essays so I can't even say its really a book as in a novel but still I am proud. Titled "Me Talk Pretty One Day" by David Sedaris (brother of the actress Amy Sedaris) the book is (as stated earlier) a collection of essays he wrote about events that happened in his life. This is the second book that I have read by Sedaris (after "Naked") and though many people believe "Naked" to be his best book I have to say I enjoyed this one a lot more. Maybe because I knew what I was going into when I started, maybe because this one seemed more believable, maybe because this one was filled with more short stories while that one had longer ones a few of which failed disappointing me much more after reading 50pgs as opposed to this book where even if a few stories where not too good they only took 10-15mins at most to get through and therefore could be forgiven especially considering how many good ones there were. This being said a warning must be given: Sedaris writes in a way that is many times very vulgar and crude, talking about some subjects that I believe many would not discuss with even the closest of friends and at times being quite mean to other people he write about. This being said even though the writing is cruel and vulgar it is at the same time (somehow) very eloquently written showing a vast knowledge of the English language. This book is not for everyone. This book is not for most. There are some stories that can be read by all that are also wonderful yet there are also quite a few that your average America will be very displeased with. But for those who have (the many times) sardonic sense of humor and the stomach for some of the things he writes will be pleased with this nice collection of essays. Simply put (for those who know me) if you have my sense you humor you will enjoy this book.